The Teabaggers real fear

Paula Abdul Appointed to Obama Death Panel. The latest rightwing rumor.

Many are worried that the right-wing appeals to idiots is running out things to make up to try and scare people with. Sarah Palin’s attempt to link counseling on living wills to “Death Panels” would seem to be the bottom of the barrel, but I’m sure the Republicans can dip farther into the crazy bucket.

They have already tapped the Anti-Vaxers telling them the Government plan would mean forced Vaccinations (It doesn’t but it should), and the people who don’t get irony by telling them it would mean a government take-over of Medicaid, Medicare, and the National Institute of Health (You know the guys who do the drug research). Why not take it farther.

Bobby Jindal could tell everyone that under the government plan exorcisms wouldn’t be considered a medical treatment (oops that one is true).

How about appealing to the homeless crazies by saying the government plan will outlaw tinfoil hats, that should get their base riled up.

Maybe Sarah could repeat the line she used about how the Federal Government will spend money on research to find cures instead of treating people. Because everyone (at least her followers) knows that we can’t have science in medicine.

She could tie the two things she is against together, government provided rape kits and allowing the elderly to go to the emergency room and say how the government plan would allow police to gather evidence against rapists, and not allow the elderly to die while waiting for simple procedures (oops that one is true as well).

Maybe they can roll everything together and go for the sum of the fears that frighten their base.

The Ultimate Republican Fear

Government Healthcare will turn people gay, if you ask how you are picking on them for being Christians (even though there are many gay Christians), this will lead to homosexuals breeding out the Nordic bloodlines (‘cause them homosexuals breed like bunnies), since only white people can be Protestants this will incur the Protestant God’s anger.

He will lash out against the US by causing the Large Hadron Supercollider to spew out mini-black holes that will destroy American cities in the south as judgment on their sinful ways.

This will lead to mass immigration of non-English speaking people to our country and history shows that America can’t survive waves of immigration.

This immigration will allow al-Qaida to acquire suitcase nukes that weigh 5lbs and can’t be detected by simple Geiger Counters (these only exist in TV series 24, but al-Qaida is relentless in seeking fictional weapons) that they will deploy against the US for its insult to the Protestant God.

This would cause the France to make a new World Currency making the US dollar worthless.

This makes China repossess all our oil drilling rigs so we can no longer tap the totally infinite amounts of oil under US soil and we have to turn to drilling for geothermal power, which will cause massive earthquakes because God does not like people using alternative energy sources.

The earthquakes lead to massive media piracy making content generators to ask their fans to support them through advertising or direct donations cutting RIAA out of their fair share of $23.85 out of every $24 CD. Without Sony and EMI controlling the music industry American culture can’t dominate the world and Japanese and European companies will control culture.

With people living longer under a government run system, social security will run out of money and gangs of Elderly Citizens (Gray Panthers) will roam the streets attacking the young and fit members of society for money.

In order to appease these Gray Panthers the government will start printing money leading to hyperinflation and it will take a wheel barrel of cash to buy a loaf of bread.

Finally the combination of all these things will make Americans turn away from watching TV and will go out and talk to their friends and neighbors and realize that they don’t have to live locked up inside their homes afraid of the outside world and let corporations to take away their civil liberties one by one.

And having citizens that aren’t afraid is the Republicans ultimate fear.

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